Venturing off to talk about a topic that concerns us all. I'll be getting back to posting regularly and updating new annotations from Childe Harold but let's take a break from that and entertain ourselves with some male/female angles...
It's animal instinct. We are human beings, which means: we are designed to prepare ourself for mating. Especially in sophisticated societies, people are spending a ridiculous amount of money on grooming and packaging (themselves) so we can be individually presented in the most polished way possible. And, we are always thriving to look the way that attract the opposite sex (or the same sex, whatever you prefer). You cant deny it, it's bound to happen, no matter how much psychology you've read or how deeply cynical you've become after having spend too much time in a game called life.
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| credit: Ran Xia (rhinoriddler-art.tumblr.com) |
Of course, there are differences between male and female: the difference beween top-down and bottom-up. You don't have to agree with this although I'm telling you it's generally true: women pay attention to whatever is above a man's shoulders and observe downwards. They would, of course, be impressed by someone with great hair, or an idiosyncratic mustache, bright smile, or, you know, the classics: beautiful eyes, straight nose like the one on a Greek sculpture, and then a strong jaw, exemplified by Cary Grant, most of the people who played Mr. Bond, etc. Height is important, and the general physical fitness, but for a large proportion of woman, the face value account for the most. So, in order to stand out in the crowd, a man's facial hair is, like a peacock's plume, to be put on parade with an aim to impress, and to set the tune for his self identity.
For centuries, men do the strangest things with their facial hair. I wasn't the least surprised when I discovered there's competitive beard sculpting. Personally, I think this is not just another weird sport like the hot dog eating contest, but has some value in regard to anthropology. It's part of our culture to decorate ourselves. In the animal kingdom, the males are always more extravagant with their looks, a phenomena that has been kept consistent in humanity until recent history, when the grooming standards for men becomes sort of boring and uniformed. We put attires and styles into categories and try to pick the socially acceptable ones; we check and double check in front of a mirror so that we don't get cornered on the street for being one of a kind. People who work in the field of arts and culture generally have more liberty when it comes to styles, yet the never-ending struggle of self-consciousness sometimes drive the entire society mental with frivolous dos and dons.
Me? I'm tragically stereotypical when it comes to making first impressions. A good laugh always adds points; and the sincerity in the eyes makes everything else melt away.
For men it's bottom up: I don't quite understand why but we are mostly in consent that when a man look at woman, it's likely that he would start from her feet and move up from there. The figure as a whole matters more than the face, or any other details for that matter. I'm not saying faces are not important, otherwise the cosmetic industry wouldn't be booming all these years, and people would never have to save up their entire life for some expensive plastic surgeries. But the botom-up model, can probably explain women's obsession of shoes.
This is definitely something I need to work on. Having always been inclined to hats rather than heels, I could never understand most of my cohorts' passion with those super uncomfortable, unpractical footwear. Indubitably this is one of the reasons why I'm still single. People say high heels give a woman confidence, not comfort. Shoes, expensive shoes, luxuriously looking, fabled in Cinderella's story, designed by high-end fashion masters, shoes, provide women with vanity, a sense of self recognition. I forgot the source, but the the quote goes like this: "fashion is what you want, not what you need." It's a kind of art form that has accompanied humanity since the beginning of time when the first ape decided to wear a string of bones around its neck.
Getting back to the topic of shoes, we can't forget the its not so subtle and altogether highly symbolic sexual indication. In real world its almost impossible to find a shoe that is perfectly fit; there's never "the one" like Cinderella was for her prince. We compromise and add inserts, or band-aid strips, to adapt our feet into those fancy containers. Most of us are the wicked stepsisters, jealous of the "idea" of a perfect girl, beautiful and virtuous, an abstract concept that can tip-toe inside of those glass slippers, yet vanishes when the clock of reality rings.
Of course, it's always a pursuit of perfection for either men or women. Those who claim they care nothing about looks are either lying, or they're gods on earth. Psychology tells us that people mostly follow trends, and we try our best to fit in, sometimes by standing out, and that there's no way to please everyone.
Ranting inspired by documentaries:
Mansome (2012)
God Save My Shoes (2011)
The Tents (2012)
